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Digger's chopper comes a cropper.

A friend of my Dad works as an aircraft engineer at RAF Brize Norton. He reported that the base recently received an emergency call from a commercial aircraft in distress.

Landing permission was granted and the helicopter limped out of the sky. To meet the officials (and Military Police) was none other than a Mr R. Murdoch and "female companion" plus pilot.

The helicopter has a pretty simple problem, but the ground crew couldn't be arsed were too busy to deal with the media tyrant. Digger wasn't going to pay and the pilot was forced to raid the hospitality cupboard and share the contents with everyone in a vein attempt to get his expensive machine back into the air.

Following a quick 'wipe with an oily rag' and some verbal abuse, the Digger left to head back to his hollowed-out volcano.

For a short-distance aircraft, there certainly was a very large inventory of very expensive booze.

blessed_brian 15:28, reply

Further to the mailout - Those involved with The Grand Tour have been told to refer to it as TGT

(that's also how it'll appear in the EPG) - TGT, Top Gear Two. Apols if corn, etc.

deep_stoat 16:36, reply

Nominitive determinsim exclusive

In 1997, Keith Vaz opened Leicester General Hospital's Urology Assessment Ward 28a.

He gave due deferens and has since put money where his mouth was.

mike_hunt 19:46, reply

Good work on Allardyce

But relying on what Pino 'Pinocchio' Pagliara says might derail the rest of the Telegraph's expose. He used to swan around Manchester claiming he was making millions of pounds a year as an agent... while driving an old banger and living in a modest three bed house in Prestwich.

soapy_handerton 22:39, reply

Never mind that

His new build house, is simple aweful.

touchmyspastic 12:19, reply

Thanks to Big Fat Sams dismissal

I am now aware that an otters gestation period is approximately 67 days.

roger_mycock 11:55, reply

Win-Win

pink_oboe 9:37, reply

Chang-Eng

trellis 14:35, reply

Twat-Twat

deep_stoat 15:06, reply

Sunday afternoon sleb spot

Bob Geldof eating lunch in Dubrovnik, Croatia. Grudgingly posed for a photo with a tourist.

flobbit 9:12, reply

Malcolm McDowell at bedroom bar rivington st right now. A bit shorter than anticipated.

drunken_boht 19:59, reply

Schleb Schpots in that London

Saturday Morning: Bill Nighy in Berkley Sqv. with a copy of the Grauniad tucked under his arm. IDNSH shonky digits.

Saturday Evening: Ryder Cup Vice-Captain Thomas Bjorn at a wedding in The City. Drank beer, looked approachable, is boffing a BT Sport Producer. Clarence Bonus Schpot: West London has-beens of Ikea kitchen ad and Jonah Lewie re-hash fame Man Like Me were the DJs. When will they make their cameo on #PJDN?

clarenceworley 10:06, reply

I see Nighy a lot, sitting outside cafes...

... always seems a bit "can you see me?"

7zark7 20:54, reply

Attention seeking actor shocker!

clarenceworley 8:30, reply

Has anyone checked his medication?

I think someone needs to make sure Noel isn't left on his own near any sharp point things for a while. Or cars. Or guns. Or trucks. Basically, anything he can cause harm to others with. Clearly crazier than a bunch of rats trapped inside a burning meth lab.

roger_mycock 16:33, reply

Just don't let him near any bungee cables, he's got form.

curlywurly 10:35, reply

Tell me about it.

mike_lush 12:58, reply

innit...

mrsix 7:14, reply

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