Britain slightly less broken

Written by: richard gilzene

In news that will shock literally no-one, rumours abound that the current poster- children of ‘Broken Britain’, 13 year-old Alfie Patten and his 15 year-old girlfriend Chantelle Steadman, didn’t actually bash their pubescent parts together and make little baby Maisie after all.

In fact, we reckon it was someone a lot more ‘mature’ than young Alfie. But, like a slightly less retarded version of Karen Matthews, all parties involved decided it might be a good opportunity to milk some cash (estimated at half a million by Max Clifford, who yes, has stuck his oar in already) out of the various documentary and interview offers that have duly rolled in, by plonking a 13 year-old at the helm of the good ship ‘Screwed Up’. Watch for every other bum-fluffed teen that might have had a go now scrambling to get in on the act.

Tags: alfie patten, broken britain
Posted in Uncategorized |