Mental Film Round-Up

Written by: gary ogden

Here at Popbitch we like our weird and wonderful films – as is evident by our current obsession with The Human Centipede and Machete.  Only thing is, there’s loads more funked-up crazy-town films coming our way that we haven’t given any attention – but that neglect ends here.

We’ve rounded up 10 of the most mental films coming our way soon – but we’ve got to warn you, there’s some real mucky photos/trailers in here so it’s probably best not to look at this if you’re at work.

To kick things off, we’ve got Big Tits Zombie 3D ‘coming right in/on/around your face’ on DVD on the 11th of October.  It’s the well-worn story of a group of strippers fighting an army of zombies with chainsaws and swords – you know the drill.  Oh, and it’s in 3D too (hint’s in the title).

There are rumours of a theatrical screening going down somewhere – as soon as we know the details we’ll let you know – you don’t want to miss this one.  In the meantime, check out the trailer here.

 

Next up, we’ve got A Serbian Film – sure to set puke guns to warp drive, whatever that means.  Its UK premiere will be at the Frightfest horror film festival in August, and it looks to be this year’s real controversy (following in the footsteps of The Human Centipede and Martyrs before it).  It follows a porn star who descends into madness while pursuing his need to make an ‘artistic statement’ on the sexploitation industry.  What that entails we don’t quite know – all we do know is that there’s some real dodgy stuff going on with this one.  If you want to watch the trailer, here it is – but be warned, it’s got a load of nude men and woman and blood and screaming in.

 

 

It’s sequel time!  If any of you have seen 2006′s Hatchet, then you’ll know what to expect from this sequel (the fantastically named Hatchet II)- basically, more of this (again – NAT safe for work).  The original followed hulking nutfuck Victor Crowley and explored his various methods for dispatching teenagers – we can only assume the sequel will be more of the same.  That’s fine by us!

This will have its world premiere at Frightfest.

Unfortunately, there isn’t yet a trailer for this.  So, err, tough.

 

 

Let’s steer away from horror for a bit, with Gaspar Noe’s Enter the Void – an eye-shag of a movie that according to the BBFC ‘contains hard drug use and strong real sex’ – so there’s probably some willies going into vaginas somewhere along the line.  That’s not why it’s weird though – there’s some other mad stuff about a man dying and his spirit following his sister around.  It’s by the director of Irreversible, so you know it’s going to be a strange.

It’s out on the 24th September.

Here are three trailers to watch and understand look at.

 

Back to horror again, with Meat Grinder, a Thai film about a psycho Nigella called Buss, who likes to kill people and serve them to customers in her restaurant.  We’ve seen this one already, and let’s just say, it’ll put you off your lunch – especially if you’re eating in Buss’ restaurant.  It easily out-grosses any of the Saw films with its horrendous torture sequences, which is probably enough reason for you sick weirdos to want to go and watch it regardless of how good it is.  Even though it’s really good.

It’s out on DVD on 24th August.

Trailer here.

 

 

Time for a remake now, with Adam Gierasch’s Night of the Demons coming to the U.K on September 17th.  The original had a group of party goers having to deal with demonic possession and ripped off arms etc, and is required viewing for fans of cheesy 80s horror.  The remake, well, is probably the exact same thing, only with better hair.  Either way, we’re assured it’ll be insane, particularly since Adam Gierasch’s last film – Autopsy – was completely doolally.

It comes out on September 17th (we think).

Trailer here.

 

 

Didn’t enjoy Alien vs. Predator?  Well, then maybe you’ll enjoy Alien vs. Ninja.  We have absolutely no idea what the film is about, it doesn’t help that the title is so cryptic and confusing – Lord only knows what it could involve.

EDIT – It’s about Aliens vs. Ninjas.

It also makes its debut at Frightfest.

Trailer here.

 

And if aliens aren’t your thing, then maybe fish are.  Specifically piranhas.  If they are, then you’ll probably want to see Piranha 3D, because, well, it’s about fish.  Specifically piranhas.

Oh and there’s going to be loads of tits and killing and eating and shit.  Look forward to it come August 20th.

Here’s the awesome trailer.

 

Another Asian film now (they certainly know how to make insane movies – must be all those noodles from Buss’ restaurant), the completely bonkers-looking City Under Siege.  It’s about mutants or something, but it’s no X-Men.  It’s more of a What-the-fuck-is-going-on-in-this-trailer-Men.  See if you can figure it out for yourself here.

We’ve no idea about a UK release date for this one.

 

 

Last, and probably least, is Father’s Day.  This one is about a maniac on a Father-raping rampage.  That’s pretty much all you need to know.  Now, the trailer really is every kind of disgusting, so only watch if your last meal was at least two hours ago.  And you’re not around children or at work.  BECAUSE IT’S FUCKING VILE.

We’ve got no idea when this will be released, or indeed if it will be.

Click here to not want to have sex ever again.

 

 

So there we have it.  10 weird-arse flicks coming your way soon.  We’ll try our hardest to watch them all (apart from maybe Father’s Day) and tell you what’s what.

Now go and have a shower.

Tags: A Serbian Film, Alien vs. Ninja, Big Tits Zombie 3D, City Under Siege, Enter the Void, Father's Day, Frightfest 2010, Hatchet II, Meat Grinder, Night of the Demons, Piranha 3D
Posted in Film & TV |