Why’d you wanna go and put stars in their eyes? No. 17: Audrina Patridge

Written by: gary ogden

It’s time to look at another The Hills alumni this week.  The impossibly beautiful Audrina Patridge.  You know, the one who was clearly specifically designed by God to be in a bikini 24/7.

This one (she’s the one in the bikini):

So what’s she been wearing a bikini in then?  Well, cast your minds back to 2005 and a little film called Into the Blue - it starred Jessica Alba (in a bikini) and Paul Walker (not in a bikini) and it followed them as they tried to get some treasure or something -- it’s hard to follow when there’s so many bikinis strewn about the place.  Anyway, they’ve only gone and done a sequel, it’s called Into the Blue 2: The Reef and they’ve upped the bikini count.

Upping this count is Patridge (in a bikini) playing some sort of bikini-wearing nutcase who jumps around the screen screaming and shouting and hurting people, here’s a clip of her antics:

 

Pretty mental huh?

Well we think that’s her only part in the whole film actually.  So we’re going to have to end this here, people.  Not much more to say on old Audrina.  Apart from maybe some sort of forced pun along the lines of:

On the twelfth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Twelve drummers drumming,
Eleven pipers piping,
Ten lords a-leaping,
Nine ladies dancing,
Eight maids a-milking,
Seven swans a-swimming,
Six geese a-laying,
Five golden rings,
Four calling birds,
Three French hens,
Two turtle doves,
And a Patridge in a bikini!

 

But we’re not going to do that.

Strange Casting Quotient: 1/10 -- She is in a bikini

Posted in Film & TV |