Things That Make You Go Hmm – Monday link dump

>Popjustice has the new Olly Murs single. Who’d have thought he would be a reggae artist! Well, he makes  Peter Andre and Bubbler Ranx (last seen working in a carphone warhouse in south-east London) sound like their Mysterious Girl came from the heart of Trenchtown. [popjustice]

> It’s not often we’re thankful we’re not in New York, but this article on first dates makes living in Scunthorpe sound more appealing [NYT]

> Eating champion Kobayashi takes a stand against Major League Eating but overwhelming desire to eat gets him arrested [Huff Post]

> Meet Boniface the amazing scuba diving dog [Gawker]

> There was a brilliant article in Sunday Times on England’s World Cup turmoil but thanks to their paywall we can’t share it.

Straight outta Clacton!

Peter Andre: The Revelation Tour kicks off in Clacton-on-Sea next Friday. Looks like he’s going to have to sharpen up his dance routine for Mysterious Girl if he wants to beat the reigning Clacton rivals:

Sky News makes Peter Andre cry

Horrible Sky News makes Peter Andre cry by asking him if he’d be OK with Alex Reid adopting his children. Shame on you.

Touch my bicep

Peter Andre appears in an eight-page spread in OK! this week, talking about how much he loves his kids and that they are all he cares about yada yada. What surprised us was this picture of a tattoo apparently highlighting his bicep:

It’s nice to see that the spread ends with this quote: “I’m so glad I’m not part of that circus. All I want is my kids, I don’t care about anything else.”

That’d be why he has a double page spread in New! magazine every week, commenting on celebrity news. This week: “Kate wrote something on twitter over Christmas about it being out of order that my brother Mike cut Princess’ hair and that we did it to prove a point. I couldn’t actually believe this when I read it. I hate childish comments like this, but I do feel I need to set the record straight.”

Peter Andre: staying out of the circus his own way.

Scratched out Tuesday

Katie Price has been all over the celebrity magazines with her unpleasant antics in gold bikinis or tiny blue underwear. We’ve all read about how devastated she is, seen how pissed she is, and heard her speak about her ex with either tears or vehemence. 

And now, just to make the split official, Jordan has had her “Pete” tattoo inked over with a big, scratchy cross. 

Classy.

Celebrity Mag Olympics

This week we bring you a round up of the best celebrity magazine stories, photos, real life scandals and bad tats. Enjoy.

Best cover line: “I’ll destroy you Pete!” courtesy of Closer.

Best cover lie: “SJP’s husband cheats’ as their twins arrive.” from Now magazine.

Best artistic licence with a ‘source’: “Kerry Katona: ‘Why didn’t you stop me bingeing?” from Closer.

Freak of the week: ”I superglued my manhood to turn me into a woman” again, Closer. 

Worst celeb tattoo on show: Jordan’s ‘Peter’ with a big scratchy cross inked over it – various. 

Most bashed celeb of the week: Jordan  – on her ranting about Pete, wanting to destroy him, and planning more plastic surgery just to piss him off (he hated her changing her body).

Made up feature special: MJ tributes. From scandals about his doctor giving him the lethal injection to special 10 page tributes.

Jen/Jolie photo count: 5/9 mags have a story on Jen dating the new Brad, making the old Brad jealous, having found Mr Right and one says Angelina accuses Brad of sneaking back to Jen.

WINNER: It would have been Closer for just being nasty, but OK! pipped it with the picture of a nigh-on-dead Jacko and the strapline “In loving memory”.