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If you were made Pope for the day and could add a commandment, what would it be?

21 replies

supercrass 0:00, reply

Though thou art happily a papist, nevertherless thou shalt show respect to the Anglicans. Starting with this one:

mandaliet 21:16, reply

I'd get rid of that quite hypocritical cafe on the roof of the Vatican, that only serves you extra large Cokes, once youve climbed St Peters Basilica Dome. I mean, seriously. This might not be funny, but its fucking true, and fucking disgusting, and im not a religious man.

lenorman 14:00, reply

Thou shall not use quizzical intonation for every fucking sentence, or be called Gary.

arch_stanton 13:33, reply

Thou shalt wipe them out, all of them

fayekorgazm 12:22, reply

Thou shalt not use the word 'gotten'. Ever. Amen.

mosseller 12:19, reply

Whoah horsey, first things first. Who's gonna be making my vestments and cassocks? I will need designer samples and swatches. Get me Marc on the phone. And Philip can do the hat. SMILE WITH YOUR EYES GODAMMIT.

beryl_the_peril 11:57, reply

thou shalt not be fat.

I HATE fat people. except he'd say it in a German accent..

lambanana 11:51, reply

11.You may opt out of up to six of the above if you have been bumfootered as an alter boy, or made a fucking mahoosive pressie to the pope in the shape of hookers dressed as concentration camp inmates and spangles significant donation of goodly spunky faces acts to those who ask for your help. This is the word of the No.1 Nazi Pope, in the name of the soon to be resurrected Fourth Reich Lord. Aboys. Amen

kitkat 11:29, reply

Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's cellar 'entertainment'.

morning_star 11:16, reply

never ever bloody anything ever

clinton 11:14, reply

Thou shall not wear a backpack and speak in the spanish tongue whilst on a subterranean rail transport system

mrbradsteen 10:53, reply

That everyone should get funky.

deep_stoat 10:44, reply

Thou shalt not write jaunty intro tunes for British comedy shows. That's my job.

mike_hunt 10:24, reply

Sucketh the Pope's cock, for it is the body of Christ, and swalloweth of his spaff for it be the blood of Our Lord Jesus Christ the Saviour, Amen.

spank_daley 9:58, reply

Er you fucktards, the Pope can't add a commandment, they were sent down by God to Moses and he set them in stone. That's five Our Fathers and ten Hail Marys for you.

electrogal 9:44, reply

Thou shalt not base thine morality on a contemporary interpretation of a bad translation of a Middle Ages rewrite of selected excerpts of a translation of a transliteration of a dubious oral history cobbled together from the myth and legend of a dozen ancient cultures.

jesusandmaryjane 9:03, reply

brother maynard, bring forth the holy hand grenade of antioch

sgtpeppersstoneyhardcoreband 8:48, reply

Allow contraception and abortions - right kids?

tamara_bumpdeeay 7:14, reply

Alsace/Lorraine shalt be thine last territorial claim in the Sudetenland.

twattybanjo 5:59, reply

Thou shall not worship false pop idols

lennie 1:25, reply

Thou shall not call that cunt "Dave". Ever.

grimly_fiendish 0:53, reply