My birthday featured me embarrasing my girlfriend by asking a reality TV star if the real reason he'd fallen out with a girl he seemed to be on the verge of getting it on with was because he'd tried to fuck her up the arse and she wasn't keen, throwing up in the cab on the way home which got me, the missus and my mate thrown out onto the street, finally catching another cab sans mate who'd given up on me and got a bus, but having to get out before yakking again followed by the missus who then had to walk home with me in the fucking cold, then getting all pitiful when we got home and sleeping on the sofa in a strop because I'd let everyone down, and finally waking up with an almighty back pain which meant I couldn't do the sex for days.