Sign up here to get the email every Thursday • Email address:

Body week: In a Frankenstein style, put together your perfect person.

 (Threaded) (Answer / reply)

Answers ordered by popularity, your answer will appear here soon...

hair/jawline - Johnny Depp

Eyes - Chris Nunez (look it up)

body - fabio cannavaro

humour - david mitchell

cock - liam neeson

glitterkitty Fri 3 Jul 10:49, (Answer / reply)

My cock, your mouth.

spunk_sock Fri 3 Jul 1:25, (Answer / reply)

The bone structure of Diana Ross, the hair of Michael Hutchence, the flexibility of James Brown, the skin tone of a scotch agoraphobic, the nose of a Barbie doll and the penis of a dalmation. Maybe not the heart of Joe Kinnear this time though, eh.

spank_daley Fri 3 Jul 9:03, (Answer / reply)

deep_stoat Fri 3 Jul 12:13, (Answer / reply)

Beth Ditto's cankles, Karen Carpenter's appetite.

mrzipski Fri 3 Jul 14:59, (Answer / reply)

Would have to be the same answer as yesterday

sydbarretthomes Fri 3 Jul 9:26, (Answer / reply)

Pretty much all of Scott Bakula but with Dan Cruickshank's elephant cock.

7zark7 Fri 3 Jul 8:05, (Answer / reply)

to look like cindy crawford circa 1990-to bounce around on until he begs for mercy to look at it'd have to be paolo maldini...

minky_chunky Fri 3 Jul 14:16, (Answer / reply)

the moral fibre of Tony Benn. the body of Chris Meloni (Oz, Law & Order: SVU). the face of Gerard Butler. the wallet of Philip Green. and the cock of m50 poster.

thegingerprince Fri 3 Jul 11:05, (Answer / reply)

Natalie Portman, Lauren Lavern and Melissa Theuriau. It'd be a monumental faux pas to butcher those fillies. Instead they'd fit together in so many non permanent and enchanting ways. A bit like sex lego or dirty power rangers.

morning_star Fri 3 Jul 11:41, (Answer / reply)

Konnie Huq's much-larger-in-real-life breasts, and, well, that will do for now. Maybe a sandwich as well.

too_fat_to_skate Fri 3 Jul 11:19, (Answer / reply)

Sharapova's legs, Kelly Brook's breasts, Jennifer Connolly's face and the bottom of a 12 year old boy.

bathwithkirsty Fri 3 Jul 9:51, (Answer / reply)

All of the wonderfully filthy Tracy Emin but with full size clowns feet. Dirty sex followed by a chuckle. Perfect.

lennie Fri 3 Jul 14:50, (Answer / reply)


Doira Bairds bod with Laura Hortons brains- "Hands a little further up the shaft love" etc

quercusmarner Fri 3 Jul 13:52, (Answer / reply)

What should have won at the Oscars?

 (Threaded) (Answer / reply)

If you could vote one poster off the messageboard who would it be?

 (Threaded) (Answer / reply)

What makes you happy when you are sad?

 (Threaded) (Answer / reply)

When you were small what fairytale or cartoon character did you most want to come to life and be your friend?

 (Threaded) (Answer / reply)

If you could un-invent one thing what would it be?

 (Threaded) (Answer / reply)

If we'd run out of qotd, what would you spend your time doing instead?

 (Threaded) (Answer / reply)

First pet plus street - what's your porn name?

 (Threaded) (Answer / reply)

If you could live anywhere else, where would you move to? And why haven't you, you lazy cunt?

 (Threaded) (Answer / reply)

Name one person you really, really love, possibly in a slightly unhealthy way, and why?

 (Threaded) (Answer / reply)

Name one person you really, really hate and why

 (Threaded) (Answer / reply)

What are you doing this weekend? And don't lie or we'll know.

 (Threaded) (Answer / reply)

Online Bingo Port is the place to play free bingo and chat with your friends about the latest gossip and more. [link]
Divorce Advice For support and advice regarding all relationship matters then join Your Life AD. [link]
Keep up to speed with the C- listers. Get Tritt's Succinct Guide to Celebrities. Ralph Tritt's hilarious new book puts them all in their place! [link]
FUNNY SUBVERSIVE T- SHIRTS. Hundreds of the finest cynical, satirical, humourous yet intelligent t- shirt designs. From capitalism to communism, pop- culture to fine art and from prog- rock to folk- rock we've got your torso covered. Political, atheist, retro, geek, music, art, film, television and sporting t- shirts. [link]
Cheap Holiday Looking for cheap last minute holidays or maybe a all inclusive family holiday then holidayholiday. co. uk is the holiday site you need. With over 100 independent travel agents advertising over 4 million cheap holidays and special offers uploaded hourly what are you waiting for? [link]
FREE PARKING IN LONDON: Text the word Parking plus the name of a tube station OUTSIDE THE CONGESTION ZONE to 80039 and you’ll receive a text back giving you three locations near the tube, or the one closest to it on the same line. Texts cost £1. 50 plus std network charges [link]